(Editors’ Note: Originally delivered as a Commencement Address at the Senior High School Graduation, Ateneo de Naga University, Naga City, Philippines on April 7, 2018)

Members of the Board of Trustees, Chairman Atty. Avelino Sales, Jr.; University President, Fr. Roberto Exequiel N. Rivera, S.J.; Vice President for Basic Education, Dr. Lydia T. Goingo; Director for Senior High School, Dr. Ronald Elicay; President of the Alumni Association, Mr. Kirk Tate; Parents, family, friends; and to you our 700+ graduates; a wonderful afternoon!

It is such an honour to be the commencement speaker of this momentous event — the graduation of the 1st batch of Ateneo de Naga University Senior High School.

Today, I will tell you a secret. With this microphone, I will try that only you and me will hear it. So, please listen carefully…

In early 2016, Sha, a gas pump attendant at a Shell station in Naga City, accidentally filled my car with diesel, when it’s supposedly unleaded. What a new year gift to a month’s old car!

Some friends jokingly said the accident could have been my ticket to a lifetime supply of fuel from the station. Another suggested, I could have asked them to replace my car with any of my dream cars: a Mazda MX 5 or a Mazda 6.

These were opportunistic ideas that should be attractive to consider. But allow me to share three personal stories first:

Before ‘carrot man’ of Baguio became popular on Facebook, I met the sayote boy. He was from Carolina, Naga City. I was in grade 4 preparing to board the BLTB (now DLTB) bus for a boy scout jamboree at Mt. Makiling, when I noticed a father was pleading my scout masters to let his boy join the delegates. He was pleading because he did not have enough money for the fees and contribution required of his boy. As an offer, he handed over one big sack full of sayote to top up for the amount needed. It turned out that the father was a farmer. My Dad (Magno Jr.) seeing the situation, approached my scout masters; Mr. Damasig, Mr. Cañizo and Mr. Rayala; and appealed to them to let the boy join. I did not know what exactly happened but knowing my Dad, he must have aided the father to make his son’s wish of joining a jamboree come true.

At Makiling, I became friends with the boy. We managed to have sayote as part of our daily meals to lessen our food spending. We learned to trade our excess sayote with the other scouts from Naga Parochial and Naga Central schools, whose tents were just near ours. It was kind and compassionate of my Dad to come and aid that father and son. Today, I fully understood the gesture of my Dad that day.

In the evening of November 1, 2001, coming from Naga, I was hurrying excitedly to fetch my, then, girlfriend and her mom, who were waiting for me in Magarao, as I offered to drive them home to Calabanga. But, I met an accident. I hit a padjak loaded with a family of 5: the father, the mother, 2 little kids and a toddler. They were on their way to visit their departed loved ones at the nearby cemetery. The father picked up a steel pipe and was about to hit me when I pleaded, “Sorry po! Sorry po!” I was very scared, very afraid. I took all of them into the car, an old Kia Pride CD5, which I borrowed from my Dad. It suffered a deformed hood. That’s how bad the impact was.

With my casualties in the car, I surrendered to the police outpost at the Canaman-Magarao boundary and was brought to Canaman Police station for proper logging. I called Father Joel Tabora, S.J. and told him what I got into. Within minutes, he arrived with a team of help: my immediate superior, Fr. Danilo Isidro, S.J.; a lawyer, who is our Board Chairman today, Atty. Sales; a big, tough guy, Mr. Fajie Fajardo of the Physical Plant Administration; and driver, Bobby. They kept me company as we brought my casualties for immediate treatment at the Naga City Hospital but because it happened on a provincial road, we were directed instead to Bicol Regional Hospital, now Bicol Medical Centre. After all the medical interventions, my adrenaline must have depleted. I was very tired and exhausted. Father Dan bought me soup at Chowking Centro (now Mercury Drug). Father Joel offered that I could sleep at the couch at the President’s Office that night.

The following day, I visited the family as I continued to make sure that they were okay, especially the kids. I brought them Tamiya toy cars to somehow help them recover from the tragedy I caused. I gave the father money to have his damaged padjak fixed as I discovered he used it for livelihood. The father and the family forgave me for the accident. It was kind and compassionate of Father Joel and Father Dan to help me get through that stormy night. Today, I fully understood their gesture on that day.

In 2012, I was struggling to fund the company I started. We were running out of funds. The savings of mine and my wife’s were getting pulled out to fund the operations. It was very difficult, financially, mentally, and emotionally. I could not tell my team how struggling we were. I thought that if I would tell them, they would get dismayed and would be demotivated to work.

Alfredo Imperial Perdon of GNN invited me to be on his TV show to talk about technology. I spoke there with all the passion and optimism. Little did he knew that deep inside, I was struggling and we were at the brink of closing down after the next pay day. Several days after, a prominent businessman in the city invited me for a casual conversation. We met at Kopi Rotti (now Ranjeros) at Cereza, Magsaysay Avenue. He told me he saw me on TV, referring to my earlier interview at GNN with Fred. He said he did not fully understand the techie things I was talking about but he thought they were cool. I said to myself, “This guy is funny!” Then he asked, “Do you need help?” I knew he was asking if I needed money. At first, I denied that I did, but minutes into the conversation, I admitted. When asked how much money I would need, I replied, “…about half a million”. Easily, he responded, “Okay. Come by my office on Monday and I’ll give you the check.” I felt cold and was almost brought to tears, but I kept my composure. He must have sensed how badly, badly I needed help. “This guy can read minds even if you’re on TV”, I said to myself. I asked him how much interest I would have to pay, and how soon should I pay it back. His response almost short-circuited my brain. I could not forget how he said this, in Bicol ̶ “Gamiton mo lang. Pag tapos ka na, balik mo.” Use the money. Return it when you’re done. It was kind and compassionate of him to aide a stranger that I was. Today, I fully understood the gesture of that businessman.

Let me share with you a secret I discovered. If you want the Universe to be kind and compassionate to you, you have to throw kindness and compassion out into the Universe first. In your thoughts, in your heart, and in your gestures, above all.

How do I know this works? Well, it turns out that science declared this for a fact. The law of physics explains, “For every action, there is always, an equal and opposite reaction.” Not more, not less, just equal. If you believe in karma, it is the same thing. That is why the golden rule is, “Do not do unto others, what you do not wish done unto you.” It is therefore, that simple. And that’s the secret. Throw kindness and compassion out unto the Universe, and they will come back to you, always, always. That is the secret.

So going back to Sha, the gas pump attendant who accidentally filled my car with the wrong fuel… Well, I pulled her to my side, gently hugged her to comfort her tears (which did not work, by the way,  because it triggered more tears). I did that to let her know that with her technician friends already working on the fix, the car will be just fine.

There is a reason why the Creator placed our heart at the centre of our being. As we use our mind to reason, the heart is there to validate, like the North Star guiding the sailors. If there is calm and inner peace in our gesture, it must be right. It elevates our being. We become transcendent beings. Now you know the secret.

There was calm and inner peace when I decided to hug Sha and assured her, “It’s going to be alright. And no one is going to get fired.” That day, I fully understood my gesture.

Today, as you graduate as Ateneans, to be men and women for others, may your journey be filled with kindness and compassion.

Thank you very much and congratulations to each and every single one of you.

About the author: MAGNO EDILBERTO R. CONAG III is the founder and CEO of Nueca Technologies Inc., a Naga City based software and eCommerce company known for Tindahang Tapat for sari-sari stores; Hungrily for food delivery, Community Mart for groceries and supplies; and eSalvar, the contact tracing initiative for Naga City. He also serves in the Board of Trustees of Ateneo de Naga University, his alma mater. He is a founding member of HAKA Naga, the city’s startup community.